I just pulled Morris, an Empires and Puzzles Season 4 (Underwild) 3 star hero. Now, I know you’re wondering, what could possibly be so great about this 3 star hero that he deserves a write-up? Well my friends, you’re in for a surprise…
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Caveat: This post contains game-play speculation and personal opinion. It may also contain adult comedy and sarcasm. It is not advice and is solely for entertainment, and informational, purposes.
Morris’ Element, Class, Special Skills, Passives & Talents
Here are his key stats & facts.
Element: Dark (Purple)
Mana Speed: Average
Special Skills: 1) Removes all status effects and stacks from the caster. Removes even status effects and stacks that are otherwise undispellable or uncleansable. 2) Caster digs a hole and hides in it for 2 turns. 3) While in the hole, the caster can’t gain mana, but is immune to normal attacks, special attacks , and all status effects. 4) After 2 turns the caster jumps out from the hole and deals 223 damage to a random enemy. 5) The hit enemy receives the following status ailment: 6) The target can’t gain mana for 2 turns.
Passive: 1. DECREASE AILMENT DURATION ~ Duration of the first 3 status ailments this hero receives from Special skills is decreased by 1 turn.
Talent: Revive ~ +30% chance to revive with 1 HP after a fatal attack. The revive is applied at the end of the turn.
Is Morris worth Levelling? (Empires and Puzzles)
No – but I’m gonna.
Take another look at Morris’ Special skills. -All those words, and nothing really said.
I don’t know who was paid to put Morris together, but I’m thinking it was a kid on Work Experience… who happens to like moles.
Picture this: The kid is there at SG HQ, sitting on a beanbag next to his Mentor, writing this story out on lined-paper….
‘the mole cleans himself all up and down, before digging a hole and hiding in it. Then the mole “jumps” out of the hole and yells “surprise”, then he slaps a stranger, before sniggering in the corner.’
And even more fantastic -this school project actually made it past SG development.
So what’s so amazing about Morris? Why have I written a review for him?
Because he’s my submission for the Worst 3 Star Hero in Empires and Puzzles. He does nothing.
And he does that ‘nothing’ with a mana speed of Average! Why is he Average? Why not just make him Very Slow, and call it a day?
… Look, his name’s Morris, for crying out loud.
Don’t get me wrong; I’ve nothing against the Morrises of the world. But as the name of a hero in an Epic fantasy game?
Is Morris the Worst 3 star hero in Empires & Puzzles?
Morris is so bad, he’s good.
I’m sure there are players out there, who will profess to a strategy of fielding 5 Morrises for a 3 star tournament. I can see it now:
- Holes being dug everywhere
- All enemies hiding
- My heroes start slapping each-other out of confusion
- Then 1 Morris re-appears, Konks my Costumed Jahangir in the back of his head, giggles to himself, then disappears down a hole again.
I submit that Morris does nothing of any value.
Scratch that… He makes people smile. That’s his real super power.
Let’s compare Morris to the other contenders for Worst 3 Star Hero of all-time:
|Hero||Mana Speed||Main Skill||Secondary Strike/Skill|
|Morris||Average||Digging holes.||Makes people smile.|
|Dawa||Average||210% to target and minor damage to nearby.||Will appear at Summoning Gates when least expected.|
|Renfeld||Average||215% damage to target.||Is also a part-time Cosplay makeup artist.|
|Struck from list following a reader’s appeal.||Has a talent for braiding beards.|
Morris, Empires and Puzzles Underwild Hero
My final thoughts:
OK, I’ve been kidding around with Morris. But when I first pulled him I was annoyed, because I wanted a hero who actually did something. Somebody who decimated the field.
Then I read his card and saw SG have a great sense of humour. -This little mole is more than the sum of his parts.
And for that reason, I’ll be levelling Morris, and will put him on my Defense team for the next 3-star tournament. That way, the opposition can have a good laugh too.
He also has a half decent hit, after all the digging and hiding is done.
Old Cynic’s Hero Grade: Meek
What are your thoughts? Did I get it wrong, or did I miss something? Let me know in the comments below.
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